Foreplay.

  • Gorgeous day in San Francisco, birds chirping, sun shining, perfect riding weather ✔
  • Male, average build, tall-ish, on a motorcycle ✔
  • Arai XD helmet
  • Aerostitch one piece, fairly new, red ✔
  • Full fingered leather gloves of some kind, Helds, Racers or AlpineStars
  • Ducati Multistrada, brand spankin' new, 992cc desmodue engine, air-cooled with two valves per cylinder, naked from the waist down, showing off everything it has to offer. ✔
  • Now I'm all hot and bothered, wishing I were on my bike, not stuck in my car

And what do I see? LOAFERS. UGLY, DARK RED LOAFERS WITH TASSLES! Tassles?? Really?

You went to all that trouble, shelled out fifteen grand on a bike, helmet, a one piece and then you finish off with LOAFERS?

Ugh, men.